“I would have been here sooner but the bus kept stopping for other people to get on it.”
Jim Parsons - Sheldon Cooper

“The only surprise I like is to not be surprised.”
Wallace Shawn - Mr. Woodley

“Always hard to find, like love, Waldo, a good Chinese restaurant…”
Danny DeVito - Chesterfield

Don't anyone say "April Fool's" again or I'll rip them apart!
Amy Steel - Kit

“- Chaz: Why don't you tell us something about yourself?
- Nikki: All right, something about myself... I wanna work with handicapped children, and my parents are my best friends. And I start convent school next semester... and I fuck on the first date. April Fool's!”
Clayton Rohner - Chaz
Deborah Goodrich - Nikki