“- Robert Crosbie: I'll do whatever you think is right.
- Howard Joyce: I don't think it's right, but I think it's expedient.”
Herbert Marshall - Robert Crosbie
James Stephenson - Howard Joyce

“- Wolf J. Flywheel: There are many bonds that will hold us together through eternity.
- Martha Phelps: Really, Wolf? What are they?
- Wolf J. Flywheel: Your government bonds, your savings bonds, your liberty bonds.”

Groucho Marx - Wolf J. Flywheel
Margaret Dumont - Martha Phelps

“Consider, Watson, the irony, the tragic irony, that we accepted the commission from the victim to find her murderer. For the first time... we've been retained by a corpse.”

Basil Rathbone - Sherlock Holmes

“I commit you to His mercy.”

Delroy Lindo - Jackson

“- Cindy: I'm looking for something more than just good sex.
- Brenda Meeks: I know. You want commitment.
- Cindy: No, I want great sex.”
Anna Faris - Cindy
Regina Hall - Brenda Meeks