“- Matt: Isn't part of the priestly thing giving relationship advice?
- John: Relationship advice, yes - sex advice, no. Part of the priestly thing is not to have sex, remember?
- Matt: It's funny. I didn't say a thing about sex. I guess thinking about sex is part of the priestly thing, at least for some.”
Josh Hartnett - Matt
Adam Trese - John

“If you wanna smear mud on your ass, smear mud on your ass - just be honest about it. Look, Gene, I've never told anyone this before, but I can suck my own dick, and I do it a lot.”

H. Jon Benjamin - Can of vegetables

“You see what you gotta do is you gotta get your thumb up in there... Actually get two thumbs up there and you an be like the Fonz ya know...Heyyyy!”
Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps

“I wasn't suggesting that the two of you get married, I just thought maybe you could get it on!”
Cameron Diaz - Christina Walters

“- Tristan: Samuel, God bless you. You are good at everything you try to do. I'm sure it'll be the same with fucking.
- Samuel: Tristan, really. We're talking about my future wife.
- Tristan: Oh, you're not gonna fuck her?
- Samuel: No!
- Tristan: No?
- Samuel: No! I'm planning to be with her.
- Tristan: I recommend fucking.”
Brad Pitt - Tristan Ludlow
Henry Thomas - Samuel Ludlow