“- Kevin Sandusky - Hot LZ: Now, whichever format porno backs is usually the one that becomes the uh most successful. But, you know, Sony, every PlayStation 3 has a Blu-ray in it.
- Kirk Lazarus: You talkin' to me this whole time?
- Kevin Sandusky - Hot LZ: I was talking to whoever was listening.
- Kirk Lazarus: Jesus Christ, man!”

Jay Baruchel - Kevin Sandusky - Hot LZ
Robert Downey Jr. - Kirk Lazarus

“- Screen Voice #1: Look! An alien!
- Screen Voice #2: Yeah. We'd better have sex with each other.
[Sam McKenna discreetly looks at the screen]
- Mitch Weaver: Note to self: Sam just looked at the screen.”

Norm MacDonald - Mitch Weaver

“What's the big deal? They're the same guys, they just watch a different kind of porno now.”
Adam Sandler - Sonny Koufax

“I saw a gayporno once. I didn't know until halfway in. The girls never came.”
Scott Mechlowicz - Scott Thomas

“- Dennis Watson: Tell me, Mr. Gardner... have you ever had sex with a man?
- Chance: No... I don't think so.
- Dennis Watson: We could go upstairs right now.
- Chance: Is there a TV upstairs? I like to watch.”
Mitch Kreindel - Dennis Watson
Peter Sellers - Chance