“- Yoji Nishimurar: All wisecracks you're making make you seem disrespectable. I just do this for you to save face. Besides, press writes their own story anyway.
- Jack Elliot: I'll deal with the Press! And I'll take care of my own face, you just translate what comes out of it! You got me?”
Toshi Shioya - Yoji Nishimura
Tom Selleck - Jack Elliot

“- B-rad: Shut up, ho.
- Shondra: Who you callin' ho, ho?
- B-rad: Yo, ho, the same ho that gave up that weak-ass kiss five minutes ago in the bedroom.”
Jamie Kennedy - Brad 'B-Rad' Gluckman
Regina Hall - Shondra

“- Pappas: Let me tell you something, Harp. I was in this bureau while you were still popping zits on your funny face and jacking off to the lingerie section of the Sears catalog. But there's something I've learned in all my years...
- Ben Harp: Why don't you astonish me, shitbrains.
- Pappas: Respect for my elders!”

Gary Busey - Pappas
John C. McGinley - Ben Harp

“- Silas P. Silas: You're an asshole.
- Dean Carl Cain: Did you just call me an asshole?
- Jamal King: No I said idiot.
- Dean Carl Cain: An idiot.
- Jeffery: No sir, no sir, I...
- Dean Carl Cain: What did you say?
- Jeffery: I said that this school has nice halls.”
Method Man - Silas P. Silas
Obba Babatundé - Dean Carl Cain
Redman - Jamal King
Justin Urich - Jeffrey

“I don't wanna badmouth the kid, but he's a horrible, dishonest, immoral louse. And I say that with all due respect.”
Woody Allen - Danny Rose