“Insurance companies. See, all the banks is insured now, and that's who takes the loss. And hell, they're the biggest crooks of 'em all. We are just little thieves stealing from the big thieves, that's all.”
Matthew McConaughey - Willis Newton

“I hope you guys are insured.”
Michael Oliver - Junior

“- Brian Hope: Look Charlie, some con men sell life insurance. The church sells afterlife insurance. It's brilliant! Everyone thinks you might need it, and no one can prove you don't.
- Charlie McManus: The church isn't selling anything, Brian.”
Eric Idle - Brian Hope
Robbie Coltrane - Charlie McManus

“- Boolie Werthan: Mama, cars don't behave. They are behaved upon. Fact is, you demolished that Chrysler all by yourself.
- Daisy Werthan: Say what you want, I know the truth.
- Boolie Werthan: The truth is, you just cost the insurance company $2,700. You're a terrible risk. Nobody's gonna want to issue you a policy after this.”
Dan Aykroyd - Boolie Werthan
Jessica Tandy - Daisy Werthan

“- Insurance Salesman: It's not really what I'm selling. But what I have to offer.
- Thane Furrows: What do you have to offer that happens to cost money?
- Insurance Salesman: I offer security.
- Thane Furrows: Insurance.”
Fred Willard - Insurance Salesman
Steve Oedekerk - Thane Furrows