“Cynthia Sullivan-Hi, Jake, look how big you're getting.
Jake Harper-It's called puberty.
Charlie Harper-It's called donuts.
”
Christina Moore - Cynthia Sullivan
Charlie Sheen - Charlie Harper
Angus T. Jones - Jake Harper

“Frank-I did not lose a leg in Vietnam so I could serve hotdogs to teenagers.
Michael Kelso-You got both your legs, Frank.
Frank-Like I said, I did not lose a leg in Vietnam!”
Mitch Hedberg - Frank
Ashton Kutcher - Michael Kelso

“- Alison Kantrowitz: I never have to listen to you ever again. I saw you. I was there. You should have seen yourself. You looked disgusting! I'm the teenager! Not you! You had your chance.
- Pearl Kantrowitz: No. I didn't.
- Alison Kantrowitz: Well then why do the rest of us have to suffer just because you fucked up your life!”

Anna Paquin - Alison Kantrowitz
Diane Lane - Pearl Kantrowitz

“That summer I turned seventeen... and started planning my escape.”
Natalie Portman - Ann August

“High school is a lot like prison: bad food, high fences, the sex you want you ain't getting, the sex you getting you don't want.”
Eddie Griffin - Luther