“- Jamie Blake: We're gonna race to Connecticut and the one that wins gets a million dollars in cash.
- Tony: Only a moron would back up a race like that!”
Dean Martin - Jamie Blake
Alex Rocco - Tony

“- Happy Gilmore: I got into this tournament for one reason: money. And now I have a new reason: kicking your ass!
- Shooter McGavin: Well, I'd like to see you try.
- Happy Gilmore: [Picks up beer bottle and smashes it in half] Let's do it, then!
- Shooter McGavin: I meant on a golf course!”
Adam Sandler - Happy Gilmore
Christopher McDonald - Shooter McGavin

“- Dim: Yarbles! Great bolshy yarblockos to you. I'll meet you with chain or nozh or britva anytime, not having you aiming tolchocks at me reasonless. Well, it stands to reason I won't have it.
- Alex: A nozh scrap any time you say.
- Dim: Doobidoob. A bit tired, maybe. Best not to say more.”
Warren Clarke - Dim
Malcom McDowell - Alex (A Clockwork Orange)

“- Monica Wright: I'll play you.
- Quincy McCall: For what?
- Monica Wright: Your heart.”
Sanaa Lathan - Monica Wright
Omar Epps - Quincy McCall

“Hey Kinney you Bastard its you and I!”
Casey Siemaszko - Charles 'Charley' Bowdre