“For a hero, you're quite a hypocrite!”
Dylan Moran - David

“My $2,000 watch is a fake, and so am I.”
Colin Farrell - Stu Shepard

“It's a stinking hypocritical world isn't it Brent where rapists become pillars of the community, with stinking hypocritical people in it who wouldn't miss their own befouled lives much so... so... so what better way than to take away the only innocence they have left... their precious virginal children.”
Jay Mohr - Leonard Marliston

“It's hard to tell how many emotions were real and how many were manufactured just to get the other person to bring over more pot.”
Jason Lee - Jay Murphy

“I wish I had someone I could really respect. Hey, look at the cans on that bimbo!”
Adrian Zmed - Jay O'Neill