“- Chet: You will be Shee-lana, Shee-lana, the oak tree woman.
- Connie: Oh, I love it when I'm the oak tree woman!
- Chet: Temptress of the woods.
- Connie: Yes, Yes!
- Chet: Yes, and I will be... Burt.
- Connie: Burt!
- Chet: A guy named Burt. Or I could be Smokey's cousin horny.”
John Candy - Chet Ripley
Stephanie Faracy - Connie Ripley

“- Marcel: I'm sorry, I thought you were alone.
- Lou Peckinpaugh: I tried it that way. It's not as much fun alone.”

James Coco - Marcel
Peter Falk - Lou Peckinpaugh

“When you are alone eternally, you live for the comfort of the senses: food, sex. I'd become very selective and it was getting harder for me to find food, even living in the city. My choosiness about food cost me my lover, and without him there is no sex.”
Anne Parillaud - Marie

You don't have what they call "the social skills". That's why you never have any friends, 'cept fo' yo' mama.
Kathy Bates - Helen 'Mama' Boucher

“Hair swept up. Haven't touched your cake. Probably drumming your fingernails on the white linen tablecloth, the way you do when you're really feeling down. Perhaps looking at those nails thinking: 'God, I should have stopped in all my evil plotting to have that manicure, but it's too late now.”

Rupert Everett - George Downes