“Collegegirls have three times more sexual partners than a regular girl.”
Gary Wolf - Snake

- Scotty Brennen: See that girl over there in the red? Say "hi" to her and she's yours. She'll have her legs around you so tight you'll be begging for mercy.
- Josh: Well, I'll stay away from her, then.

Jon Lovitz - Scotty Brennen
Tom Hanks - Josh

“When a girl tells you how many guys she's slept with, multiply it by three and that's the real number. Didn't you fuckers learn anything in college?”
Seann William Scott - Stifler

“- Danny: Well you know, these girls are only good for one thing.
- Sonny: Yeah, what are you suppose to do with them the rest of the 23 hours and 45 minutes of the day?”
John Travolta - Danny
Michael Tucci - Sonny

“- Tania: I'm a gender-challenged male.
- Jesse Montgomery III: What does that mean?
[Tania reveals her penis]
- Jesse Montgomery III: Whoa! Dude, you're a dude!”
Teressa Tunney - Tania
Ashton Kutcher - Jesse Montgomery III