“- Elise Elliot Atchison: Should I have done your homework, Bill! I did. By the way, here's a copy of her birth certificate.
- Bill Atchison: I didn't know... God! What are you going to do?
- Elise Elliot Atchison: What am I gonna do? Well, for now I'm just going to say the f word... Felony.”

Goldie Hawn - Elise Elliot Atchison
Victor Garber - Bill Atchison

“Hi. I’m Eep. In my defense, I had been living in a cave my whole life, and I didn’t really come across other people very often, let alone a boy! And to think, the only two teenagers in the world, and we found each other. It’s like fate brought us together. My whole family loved him, except for dad. But eventually, Guy won him over.”
Emma Stone - Eep

I've never been very good with relationships. In fact, most of mine ended with "Hey, what are you doing in bed with that other woman?". And that was me talking!
Jon Lovitz - Richard Clark

“- Cow Pat Keegan: Funny what attracts people, innit?
- Dan Starkey: Sorry?
- Cow Pat Keegan: Me & Margaret. You & Margaret. You & your wife. Me & your wife. I suppose really to complete the circle, you should sleep with my wife. But I wouldn't recommend it.”
Jason Isaacs - Cow Pat Keegan
David Thewlis - Dan Starkey

“- Lilli Hargrave: You lied to me.
- Richard Lestrange: When did I lie to you?
- Lilli Hargrave: You promised you'd never hurt me.
- Richard Lestrange: And when did I hurt you?
- Lilli Hargrave: Every time you stare at her, you hurt me.
- Richard Lestrange: I'm sorry. It's just that she's so different.”
Milla Jovovich - Lilli Hargrave
Brian Krause - Richard Lestrange