“Being a private eye may not be much, but we do have a code of honor. It's all right to fool around with your partner's wife, but once he's dead it makes it all so dirty.”
Peter Falk - Lou Peckinpaugh

“From bodily fluids and hair samples, we've determined that a bunch of old homeless dudes had an orgy in there.”
Peter R. Thewes - Hazmat Officer

“Rosa Diaz-Come on, Peralta! Holt said to use the whole team. We all want this solved.
Jake Peralta-I appreciate the offer, but I work best alone. Except when it comes to sex. Actually, sometimes including sex.”
Andy Samberg - Jake Peralta
Stephanie Beatriz - Rosa Diaz

“Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.”
Woody Allen

“- Rusty Griswold: Dad wasn't speeding. The cop stopped us because Dad forgot to...
- Ellen Griswold: He was speeding, Rusty!
- Rusty Griswold: No he wasn't, Mom. He...
- Clark Griswold: Rusty! Listen to your mother. I was speeding. I was driving like a maniac. We can all be grateful for this man for stopping us.”
Anthony Michael Hall - Rusty Griswold
Beverly D'Angelo - Ellen Griswold
Chevy Chase - Clark Griswold