Basic principles: no woman wakes up saying "God, I hope I don't get swept off my feet today!”. Now, she might say, "This is a really bad time for me”, or something like "I just need some space” or, my personal favorite, "I'm really into my career right now”. You believe that? Neither does she. You know why? Because she's lying to you, that's why.
Will Smith - Hitch

“- Rufus T. Firefly: Where is your husband?
- Mrs. Gloria Teasdale: Why, he's dead.
- Rufus T. Firefly: I bet he's just using that as an excuse.”
Groucho Marx - Rufus T. Firefly
Margaret Dumont - Mrs. Gloria Teasdale

“You can give birth to an excuse so easily you will believe it's always been there.”
Sonja Sohn - Lauren Bell

“- Richard 'Dick' Brewer: Rumor has it you killed a man, Billy. You don't seem like the killing sort.
- Dirty Steve Stephens: Yeah, Billy. What'd you kill him for?
- William H. 'Billy the Kid' Bonney: He was hacking on me.”
Charlie Sheen - Richard 'Dick' Brewer
Dermot Mulroney - Dirty Steve Stephens
Emilio Estevez - William H. 'Billy the Kid' Bonney

“- Shaun: I'm so sorry.
- Phillip: Sorry for what?
- Shaun: Er… nothing.”
Simon Pegg - Shaun