“- Rufus T. Firefly: Where is your husband?
- Mrs. Gloria Teasdale: Why, he's dead.
- Rufus T. Firefly: I bet he's just using that as an excuse.”
Groucho Marx - Rufus T. Firefly
Margaret Dumont - Mrs. Gloria Teasdale

“You can give birth to an excuse so easily you will believe it's always been there.”
Sonja Sohn - Lauren Bell

Basic principles: no woman wakes up saying "God, I hope I don't get swept off my feet today!”. Now, she might say, "This is a really bad time for me”, or something like "I just need some space” or, my personal favorite, "I'm really into my career right now”. You believe that? Neither does she. You know why? Because she's lying to you, that's why.
Will Smith - Hitch

“Bad alibi like dead fish - cannot stand test of time.”
Sidney Toler - Charlie Chan

“- Claire Porter: You're really not like a detective at all, Mr. Charles. You don't pound the table or shout or threaten.
- Nick Charles: I'm not really a detective. I just use that as an excuse to get out of the house at night.”
Stella Adler - Claire Porter
William Powell - Nick Charles