- Scotty Brennen: See that girl over there in the red? Say "hi" to her and she's yours. She'll have her legs around you so tight you'll be begging for mercy.
- Josh: Well, I'll stay away from her, then.

Jon Lovitz - Scotty Brennen
Tom Hanks - Josh

“Moral concepts? I'm a scientist. To me there is no good or evil, only true or false. Work with one; discard the other.”

George Zucco - Dr. Alfred Morris

“No true scientist can have anything to do with women.”
Walter Pidgeon - Pierre Curie

“Would it not be the achievement of all time to keep the brains of great thinkers, scientists, authors, statesmen, alive? To derive benefit from their wisdom and thinking power, even after their death - to make them literally immortal?”
Erich von Stroheim - Prof. Franz Mueller

“I'm not an innovator like you, Phil. I'm an adapter, and to that end, I have profited from your ideas.”

Christopher McDonald - Wilson Croft