“- Harold: What the hell was Colin doing with a Lime'ouse minicab driver in Belfast?
- Jeff: Colin can't drive.
- Harold: Oh, that makes sense.”
Bob Hoskins - Harold
Derek Thompson - Jeff

“Would you like to know why I can't drive this kinda car? I'll tell you why, I'm used to luxury cars. Have you ever heard of a luxury car? You know what luxury means? Ever heard of Cadillac, Cadillac Eldorado? That's what I drive. I drive cars that shift themselves.”

Vincent Gallo - Billy Brown

“- Cindy: Girls have to do everything. Boys are totally clueless when it comes to sex. It starts with them trying to unhook our bras, fumbling around, and it never changes. Wait until they try to put their dick into you.
- Diana: Please don't say they need help with that.
- Cindy: Always.”
Kristen Miller - Cindy
Jessica Driscoll - Diana, Principal's Secretary

“- Larry Johnson: Y'know, maybe there is nothin' wrong with us, maybe it's just in our heads.
- Muggsy Bogues: Yeah, we're all right. It's just some psychosomatic deal, or something to do with the alignment of the Moon or another planet.”

Larry Johnson - Himself
Tyrone Bogues - Muggsy Bogues

“I had a date with a pilot last night. Couldn't get my seat back in the upright position. You know what I mean? You know what I mean? No, you wouldn't.”
Ellen Lee DeGeneres - Janet Hall