“- Town Councilman: Let's get down to business. The trouble with our party is everybody talks too long all the time.
- Doc Bissell: That's the trouble with all parties.”
Franklyn Farnum - Town Councilman
Harry Hayden - Doc Bissell

“- Louis Howe: Why are you a Democrat?
- Franklin Delano Roosevelt: The Democratic Party is the party of the people, and I'm a man of the people.
- Louis Howe: You're a Roosevelt. Since when does a Roosevelt know about people?”
David Paymer - Louis Howe
Sir Kenneth Branagh - Franklin Delano Roosevelt

“All I want for Christmas, Santa, is two fat bitches, 2 bags a weed and 2 bags of chips to give to the fat bitches.”
Mike Epps - Day-Day

“Man, we gotta have this party we had some bad hoes coming in here! They said they gonna fuck for a buck, do something strange for a little change an you know we gonna make 'em holla for a doller.”
Mike Epps - Day-Day

Oh, I heard about him. They call him the Santa Claus Crook or the Santa Claus Crip or something like that. He robbed a lady out in the parking lot last night, called her a "ho ho ho" and kept on running.
Sommore - Cookie