“- Jelly: I'm gonna get a bite to eat. You wanna sandwich or somethin'?
- Miami Hall Guard: What kind of sandwich ain't too fattening?
- Jelly: A half a sandwich.”
Joe Viterelli - Jelly
Dave Corey - Miami Hall Guard

“- Julia: The best hot dogs in Judgement City are supposed to be over by the Hall of Records.
- Daniel Miller: You really love this eating thing, don't you?
- Julia: To be able to eat as much as you want, never gain an ounce and feel great. Please.”
Meryl Streep - Julia
Albert Brooks - Daniel Miller

“- Dad: If you eat so much, Moocher, how come you're so damned small?
- Moocher: It's my metabolism. I eat 3 times a day and my metabolism eats 5 times a day.”
Paul Dooley - Dad
Jackie Earle Haley - Moocher

“- Jill: We don't want you to lose weight, we just want you to be healthy. Y'know, by eating less.
- Alison Scott: Ok.
- Jill: We would just like it if you go home and step on the scale, and write down how much you weigh, and subtract it by like, 20.
- Alison Scott: 20.
- Jill: And then weigh that much.”
Kristen Wiig - Jill
Katherine Heigl - Alison Scott

“- Jane Mortimer: Hi! I'm going for a sandwich. Do you want to come?
- Gilbert Rolfe: I probably should tell you, Jane - I'm married.
- Jane Mortimer: I just invited you to eat a sandwich.
- Gilbert Rolfe: Oh, eh, okay.”
Catherine Hicks - Jane Mortimer
Ron Silver - Gilbert Rolfe