- Beatrice Stanhope: Arthur, I wish you would do something about all these monkeys. I feel like Jane Goodall.
- An Ape Named "Ape": Madam, I knew Jane Goodall and you are no Jane Goodall.

Holland Taylor - Beatrice Stanhope
John Marwood Cleese - An Ape Named "Ape"

“You're an animal, Duane. But I'm an animal too, and I know how to handle animals like you.”
Tina Louise Hilbert - Opal

“- Terk: What kind of animal are you?
- Tantor: You know, I've been thinking lately that Tarzan may be some sub-species of elephant.
- Terk: Are you kidding... What are you talking about?
- Tantor: I mean, think about it. He enjoys a peanut, I enjoy a peanut...
- Terk: He looks nothing like you!”

Rosie O'Donnell - Terk
Wayne Knight - Tantor

“Juan Castillo... went to jail... for having sex with a goat. Ok? We lived on a farm! And I got lonely! We were just a couple of crazy kids!”
Steve Lemme - Juan

“- Dr. Necessiter: As you know, my research has advanced to a point where I can put her mind into the body of a gorilla.
- Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: I couldn't fuck a gorilla.”

David Warner - Dr. Alfred Necessiter
Steve Martin - Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr