“- Ellen Griswold: Audrey, don't cry. Your father didn't mean what he said.
- Audrey Griswold: Yes, he did!
- Ellen Griswold: No, he didn't. He's not going to cut off Jack's balls. Aren't you Clark?... Clark?!
- Clark Griswold: Okay, I won't.”
Beverly D'Angelo - Ellen Griswold
Dana Hill - Audrey Griswold
Chevy Chase - Clark Griswold

“I'll gouge your right eye out with my thumb, I shit you not, you little freak! Now, will you get down here? I'm gonna punch you in the eye till it turns to jelly! I'll stab you with forks till you bleed, how bout that?”

Larry Miller - Max Berman

“We're back, we're bad, you're black, I'm mad.”
Mel Gibson - Martin Riggs

“Don't be talkin' bout my momma!”
Todd Bosley - Jake Berman

“- Spike: Look, you berzerko Barbiedoll, when you mess with Spike, you mess with death.
- Becky O'Shea: You can talk the talk but can you walk the walk?
- Spike: Try me!
- Becky O'Shea: I will!
- Spike: Let's go!
- Becky O'Shea: Right now!
- Jake Berman: Somebody call 911!”
Sam Horrigan - Spike
Shawna Waldron - Becky O'Shea
Todd Bosley - Jake Berman