“- Hank: You had enough? You've learned your lesson about jumping rope in the street and using dirty language?
- Jump Rope Girl: I'm gonna tell my daddy on you, Charlie!
- Hank: Wrong answer! And the name's Hank, fuckface. Learn it!”

Jim Carrey - Hank
Heather Hodder - Jump Rope Girl

“You know, I know another little boy who has a horse. His name's Edward. The boy, not the horse.”
Jennifer Lopez - Catharine Deane

“- Will Smith: What's your daughter's name?
- Ollie Trinke: Gertrude.
- Will Smith: Damn, why'd you do that man?”
Will Smith - Himself
Ben Affleck - Ollie Trinke

“- Bors: Dagonet, she wants to get married and give the children names.
- Tristan: Women! The children already have names, don't they?
- Bors: Just Gilly. It's too much trouble so we gave the rest of them numbers.
- Lancelot: That's interesting. I thought you couldn't count.”
Ray Winstone - Bors
Mads Mikkelsen - Tristan
Ioan Gruffudd - Lancelot

“- Darcy Elliot Bobrucz: How could you name our baby Theodosia?
- Stan Bobrucz: We needed a name for a the birth certificate, I asked you what you wanted!
- Darcy Elliot Bobrucz: It sounds like a greek fishing boat, or a crater on the moon or something!”
Molly Ringwald - Darcy Elliot Bobrucz
Randall Batinkoff - Stan Bobrucz