“- Diana Barrie: Oh, Christ, I hate getting dressed like this. Why is it I'm always perfectly comfortable as somebody else. I'd be perfectly happy going as Hedda Gabler.
- Sidney Cochran: Try Quasimodo.
- Diana Barrie: Try shutting up!”
Maggie Smith - Diana Barrie
Sir Michael Caine - Sidney Cochran

“Would you be shocked if I put on something more comfortable?”
Jean Harlow - Helen

“It's control-top pantyhose. Holds you in like a stuffed sausage.”
Fran Drescher - Joy Miller

“- Velda Plendor: What is this? A pajama party? Is this what you call roughing it?
- Phyllis Nefler: One bathroom for nine people? Yes.”
Betty Thomas - Velda Plendor
Shelley Lee Long - Phyllis Nefler

“The only downer is everyones got the same idea, we all travel thousands of miles just to watch tv and check in to somewhere with all the comforts of home, and you gotta ask yourself, what is the point of that?”
Leonardo DiCaprio - Richard