“- Lem Johns: Where are we putting the coffin?
- Col. James Swindal: I don't know. I never thought about it.
- Lem Johns: We're not flying it below like a piece of luggage.”
Rob Gallavan - Lem Johns
Drew Waters - Col. James Swindal

“- Earl Rose: I deal with widows everyday! The remains will stay here.
- Roy Kellerman: I don't think so. The remains... What did you call it, your body? The hell with you, and the hell with your law.”
Rory Cochrane - Earl Rose
Tom Welling - Roy Kellerman

“- His Excellency: I presume your funeral was satisfactory.
- Henry Van Cleve: Well, there was a lot of crying, so I believe everybody had a good time.”
Laird Cregar - His Excellency
Don Ameche - Henry Van Cleve

“I hate funerals. They're an undeniable reminder of man's mortality.”

Ray McKinnon - Rollins

“- Andrew Largeman: I just feel like I've been going to too many of these lately.
- Sam: What? Dates?
- Andrew Largeman: You call this a date? This isn't a date. No, funerals.”
Zach Braff - Andrew Largeman
Natalie Portman - Sam