“- Matt Freehauf: Buddy is a married man. By all accounts, happily.
- Mavis Gary: Yeah, happily married men go to bars alone with their ex-girlfriends all the time. They call them privately and they make out with them on porches.”
Patton Oswalt - Matt Freehauf
Charlize Theron - Mavis Gary

“- John Bender: Sushi?
- Claire Standish: Rice, raw fish, and seaweed.
- John Bender: You won't accept a guy's tongue in your mouth, and you're going to eat that?
- Claire Standish: Can I eat?
- John Bender: I don't know. Give it a try.”
Judd Nelson - John Bender
Molly Ringwald - Claire Standish

“Kissing is gross. You just mash your food holes together. It’s not for that.”
Ted Danson - Michael

“I'm physiologically incapable of fidelity.”
Alfred Molina - Diego Rivera

There's nothing more certain to ruin a beautiful relationship than marriage, as soon as you get that ring around the finger suddenly you have an "ownershipsituation", prior to that its friendly you're "kind" to each other as much as I love you I want a variety of different pussy.
Woody Harrelson - Larry Flynt