“Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair. We've traveled a hundred miles 'cause we thought we were gonna score. But now it's not gonna happen. Damn it!”

Mike Judge - Beavis

“- Linda Howard: Even if I wanted to, my boss isn't here, there's no one I can quit to.
- David Howard: Well, it's time to get out. We have to touch Indians. We have to see the mountains and the prairies and the whole rest of that song. Let's make love right now. I want to have sex with you right here.”
Julie Hagerty - Linda Howard
Albert Brooks - David Howard

“You came here for a decent Scandinavian blowjob like the rest of us.”

“Do you like sex and travel?”
Bob Balaban - Bernie Nayman

- Carrie: Why do you think it's called "honeymoon"?
- Charles: Um, I don't know... I suppose it's, uh, "honey" because it's sweet as honey, and "moon" because it's the first time a husband got to see his wife's bottom.
Andie MacDowell - Carrie - Wedding One
Hugh Grant - Charles - Wedding One