“Hello, I'm Tom Hanks. The US Government has lost its credibility so it's borrowing some of mine.”
Tom Hanks - Himself

“- Joseph Turner White: What's an associate producer credit?
- Bill Smith: It's what you give to your secretary instead of a raise.”
Philip Seymour Hoffman - Joseph Turner White
Lionel Mark Smith - Bill Smith

“Taking credit when things go right doesn't work the other way.”
Nicolas Cage - Frank Pierce

“- Spenser: What do you know about credit cards?
- Hawk: I know once you get one, you're in debt for the rest of your life.
- Spenser: What about fake ones?
- Hawk: They are all based in illusion.”
Robert Urich - Spenser
Avery Brooks - Hawk

“Did I ever tell you about the time I invented snowboarding? I don't want credit for it, but they just keep giving it to me.”
David Koechner - Stumpy