“- Bilko: Maybe, a plan is not what I really need. what I really need... is just a little puppy. A little puppy with big brown eyes, who would just come to me and lick my face, and just love me so much no matter what kind of person I am.”

Steve Martin - Master Sergeant Ernest G. Bilko

“- Ying Ying: Do you know what you want? I mean, from him?
- Lena: Respect. Tenderness.
- Ying Ying: Then tell him now. And leave this lopsided house. Do not come back until he give you those things, with both hands open.”
France Nuyen - Ying-Ying
Lauren Tom - Lena

“- Grandpa Charles James: [Annie smells him] What are you doing?
- Hallie as Annie: Making a memory! Years from now, when I'm all grown up, I'll always remember my grandfather and how he always smelled of...
peppermint and pipe tobacco.”
Ronnie Stevens - Grandfather
Lindsay Lohan - Hallie Parker

“- Nick: They're recreating the night we met... the boat... the music...
- Chessy: [points to herself] The help.
- Elizabeth: It's incredibly sweet.”
Dennis Quaid - Nick Parker
Natasha Richardson - Elizabeth James

“- Elizabeth: He won't be able to take care of you! He can barely take care of himself!
- Carla: We can take care of each other!”
Diane Keaton - Elizabeth
Juliette Lewis - Carla