“- Wayne Campbell: You're worthless! You're less than nothing! What's keeping you here? You don't belong here! Why don't you just quit?
- Milton: Cause I've got no place else to go!”

Mike Myers - Wayne Campbell
Chris Farley - Milton

“Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you?”

Frank Oz - Yoda

“- Frida Kahlo: I love a man with melones that are bigger than mine.
- Diego Rivera: And I love a woman with cojones.”
Salma Hayek - Frida Kahlo
Alfred Molina - Diego Rivera

“Look at you, you ain't no gangster! You're all Mr. 2% Milk, Mr. Khaki Pants, Mr. Touched By An Angel. Get out my face!”
Alex Solowitz - Mickey Parke

“- Duty Cop: Detailed description?
- Jessica Wilhern: Brown hair. Brown eyes. A unique... ly pleasant personality.”
John Voce - Duty Cop
Catherine O'Hara - Jessica Wilhern