“- Karen Kelly: This is not about you. This is about Peyton, what's best for her. And she needs to be in a stable home with someone who's known her for whole life.
- Joe Kingman: Peyton needs her father. She needs me.”
Paige Turco - Karen Kelly
The Rock - Joe Kingman

“- Arlene: Jon! My dear little brother, we missed you. So I just thought me and the boys would come up and stay for a while with you and your lovely family.
- Jerry: Let's cut the bullshit. We need a place to live, she ran out of alimony.
- Steve: And the asshole with the boat ran out on her.”

Christine Ebersole - Arlene Aldrich
Joseph Wayne Miller - Jerry
T.J. Parish - Steve

- Dr. McCoy: Spock, this "child" is about to wipe out every living thing on Earth. Now, what do you suggest we do? Spank it?
- Spock: It knows only that it needs, Commander. But, like so many of us... it does not know what.

DeForest Kelley - Dr. McCoy
Leonard Nimoy - Spock

“I had to go to four different stores to buy four different kinds of formula. Three different kinds of diapers, bottles, towels, you have no idea how much crap these kidsneed.”
Tom Selleck - Peter Mitchell

“Look, a family full of midgets is not considered kids. That's a Gang!”
Keenen Ivory Wayans - Jack Spade