“- Marv Gomez: Where you goin'?
- Ken: Home.
- Marv Gomez: The night's just beginning!
- Ken: For you maybe, but...
- Marv Gomez: Nothin' happening? That used to be my problem, before I started wearing leather.”
Chick Vennera - Marv Gomez
John Friedrich - Ken

“- Gus: Shirley? Are you Shirley? I'm supposed to meet her here for a blind date. One of those computer deals.
- Blonde in Blue Blouse: You've got to be kidding me.
- Gus: No! You're dressed in blue. That's what she's supposed to be wearing.
- Blonde in Blue Blouse: This is not blue! It's turquoise.
- Gus: I don't give a shit. You wanna dance?”
Chuck Sacci - Gus
Jacqueline Carlin - Blonde in Blue Blouse

“- Terk: What kind of animal are you?
- Tantor: You know, I've been thinking lately that Tarzan may be some sub-species of elephant.
- Terk: Are you kidding... What are you talking about?
- Tantor: I mean, think about it. He enjoys a peanut, I enjoy a peanut...
- Terk: He looks nothing like you!”

Rosie O'Donnell - Terk
Wayne Knight - Tantor

“- Wayne: 'Know what? She's kinda like Mother Teresa.
- J.D.: Yeah, but with way better tits.”
Steve Zahn - Wayne
Jack Black - J.D.

“- Gary: Are you the pimp?
- Rajah: Yes.
- Gary: You look like Gandhi!
- Rajah: I've got girls to sit on your face.”
Gary Grossman - Gary
Sumant - Rajah