People are always saying: "The children. Pity the children". I'm tired of the children. They haven't lived, given birth, watched their friends die. I have invested 80 years in this life. The children don't know what they're missing.

Jessica Booker - Rose

“- The Dag: [to her belly] Stay right where you are, little Joe. Kind of lost his novelty out here.
- Keeper of the Seeds: You're having a baby?
- The Dag: Warlord, Jr... It's gonna be so ugly.
- Keeper of the Seeds: It could be a girl!”
Abbey Lee - The Dag
Melissa Jaffer - Keeper of the Seeds

“- Tori: I am so glad I got waxed today.
- Karen: Ugh, me too. What did you get?
- Tori: The Bald Eagle.
- Karen: I got the Bermuda Triangle.
- Lisa: The Landing Strip.
- Marcus Copeland: [as Tiffany Wilson] I got the Buckwheat.”
Jessica Cauffiel - Tori
Busy Philipps - Karen
Jennifer Carpenter - Lisa
Marlon Wayans - Marcus Copeland

“Yeah, the guy killed his own family with an ice pick. Yeah... yeah just put 'em in the cool basement, covered 'em up with a sheet and went back to makin' ice cream treats for the townsfolk. Only thing... Skip didn't count on there being a big heat wave that summer.”
Rick Ducommun - Art Weingartner
Corey Feldman - Ricky Butler

“When I was a boy, just about every summer we'd take a vacation. And you know, in 18 years, we never had fun.”
Chevy Chase - Clark Griswold