- Claude Elsinore: And I'd like to point out that these tapes have not been faked, or altered in any way. In fact they have time coding, which is very hard to fake.
- The Judge: For the benefit of the court would you please explain "time coding".
- Claude Elsinore: Well, uh... just because I don't know what it is, it doesn't mean I'm lying.
Paul Dooley - Claude Elsinore
David Beard - The Judge

“- Young Roland: You might fuck around and say some shit that'll get you shot.
- Young Mike: Shot?
- Young Roland: Shot? Ya know? Guns? Bang-bang? This nigga don't know nothin'!”
Trent Cameron - Young Roland
Sean Nelson - Young Mike

“- Congresswoman Libby Hauser: You have the full support of the Sunshine State!
- Paulette: Yay for Ohio!”
Dana Ivey - Congresswoman Libby Hauser
Jennifer Coolidge - Paulette

“- Morgan: What am I supposed to do?
- Dalton: There's always barber college.”
Terry Funk - Morgan
Patrick Swayze - Dalton

This place has a sign hanging over the urinal that says “Don't eat the big white mint”.
Sam Elliott - Wade Garrett