“- Evelyn Doyle: Grandma says she got a postcard from Mummy. She's in a place called Australia. Grandma says it's warm there.
- Henry Doyle: Yes, it is. But tell your grandmother that it's not as warm as the place she'll be going next.”
Sophie Vavasseur - Evelyn Doyle
Frank Kelly - Henry Doyle

“If there is a hell, and those sons of bitches are from it, then there has got to be a heaven.”

George Clooney - Seth Gecko

“- Daniel Miller: Is this Heaven?
- Bob Diamond: No, it isn't Heaven.
- Daniel Miller: Is it Hell?
- Bob Diamond: Nope, it isn't Hell either. Actually, there is no Hell. Although I hear Los Angeles is getting pretty close.”
Albert Brooks - Daniel Miller
Rip Torn - Bob Diamond

“- Katherine: Go to hell!
- Gabriel: Heaven, darling. Heaven. At least get the zip code right.”
Virginia Madsen - Katherine
Christopher Walken - Gabriel

“- Morgan Earp: It said that a lot of people, when they die, they see this light. Like in a tunnel. They say it's the light leadin' you to heaven.
- Wyatt Earp: Really? Well, what about hell? They got a sign there or what?”
Bill Paxton - Morgan Earp
Kurt Russell - Wyatt Earp