“- Kid: Mortal Kombat, on Sega Genesis, is the best video game ever.
- Billy Madison: I disagree, it's a very good game, but I think Donkey Kong is the best game ever.
- Kid: Donkey Kong sucks.
- Billy Madison: You know something? You suck!”
Adam Sandler - Billy Madison

“- Josh: I'm much better at video hockey.
- Paul: That's not a sport.
- Josh: It requires hand and eye coordination.
- Paul: It's not a sport if you don't sweat.”
Tom Hanks - Josh
John Heard - Paul

“- Mike: Why'd they get rid of the fighting? It was the best part of the old version.
- Sue: I think kids were hittin' each other or somethin', man.”

Jon Favreau - Mike
Patrick Van Horn - Sue

“- Trent: Yeah, but you know what, Mike? You can make their heads bleed in this one.
- Mike: Make somebody's head bleed.
- Sue: No man, we're in the playoffs.”

Vince Vaughn - Trent
Jon Favreau - Mike
Patrick Van Horn - Sue

The future is now! Soon every American home will integrate their television, phone and computer. You'll be able to visit the Louvre on one channel, or watch female wrestling on another. You can do your shopping at home, or play "Mortal Kombat" with a friend from Vietnam. There's no end to the possibilities!
Jim Carrey - The Cable Guy