“- Robert 'Bobby' Boucher Jr.: So that's what opening up a can of whoop-ass feels like.
- Coach Klein: Son, you just opened up a whole case of whoop-ass.”
Adam Sandler - Robert 'Bobby' Boucher Jr.
Henry Winkler - Coach Klein

“When I was seven years old, my daddy caught me smoking a cigar. Locked me in a broom closet for two days and two nights with nothing more than a box of cigars and a book of matches. No food, Brewster. No water, just those god damn cigars. Wouldn't let me out till I finished every last one of them. Taught me one hell of a lesson!”
Hume Cronyn - Rupert Horn

“I said kiss, fool! Damn. I offered you a snack, not the whole kitchen.”
Regina Hall - Shondra

“There's nothing wrong with Ellen. It's just that she loves too much.”
Mary Philips - Mrs. Berent

“Three people in bed are one too many for me.”
Robert De Niro - Stanley Everett Cox