“We're not people, we're lithographs. We don't know anything about love unless it's written and rehearsed. We're only real in between curtains.”
Carole Lombard - Lily Garland aka Mildred Plotka

“Mother never approved of Scraps jumping up like this. But then again, she never approved of anything.”

Johnny Depp - Victor Van Dort

“The fans are like women. When you're hitting, they love you. When you're not, they'd just as soon spit on you as look at you.”

Wesley Snipes - Bobby Rayburn

“- Lewis Scott: Who are you man? Some bitter ex-high school player who never really made it? You sit around, watching sports, criticizing professional athletes 'cause you wish it was you out there.
- Mike O'Hara: You are so far off. It's sad.”
Damon Wayans - Lewis Scott
Daniel Stern - Mike O'Hara

“You got yourself a distraction that needs dealing with.”

Chris Mulkey - Frank