“- Lucy Kolinski: You try and keep it down up here, okay, my room is right underneath.
- John Smith: I'll try not to make too much noise when I'm jumpin' up and down on the bed.”
Alexandra Powers - Lucy Kolinski
Bruce Willis - John Smith

“Billy, you know, you don't have to be embarrassed if your dick gets hard. Your dick is supposed to get hard. See? That's the whole object of this. Taggart's dick is hard, but he won't let you know 'cause he's the boss. Boss' dick got to stay limp, right? See, I ain't on duty so my dick can be hard.”

Eddie Murphy - Axel Foley

“- Terry Hoskins: Roger, what's wrong?
- Roger Cobb: What?
- Terry Hoskins: Don't I excite you?
- Roger Cobb: Edwina, what are you doing?
- Edwina Cutwater: I'm thinking of very old nuns.”

Victoria Tennant - Terry Hoskins
Steve Martin - Roger Cobb
Lily Tomlin - Edwina Cutwater

“Can we please have an erection? What the hell is going on down there?”
Tony Randall - The Operator

“- Rapist #1: I'm gettin' my dick wet.
- Rapist #2: She's only got one leg.
- Rapist #1: Easier access.
- Rapist #2: Oh... that is a good point.”
Quentin Tarantino - Rapist #1
Gregory Kelly - Rapist #2