“- Cam Wexler: When a male is sweet on a female, he searches the entire beach to find the perfect pebble to present to her. When he finally finds it, he waddles over and presents the stone by placing it at her feet. If she accepts, they'll be life-long mates.
- Charlie: It's kind of like an engagement ring.”

Jessica Alba - Cam
Dane Cook - Charlie

“Nobody is gonna be everything to you, and that ultimately it's just a simple action of committing yourself, meeting your responsibilities that matters.”
Ethan Hawke - Jesse

“- Joel Barish: I can't see anything that I don't like about you.
- Clementine Kruczynski: But you will! You know, you will think of things. And I'll get bored with you and feel trapped because that's what happens with me.”
Jim Carrey - Joel Barish
Kate Winslet - Clementine Kruczynski

“- Maggie Chester: I was kind of seeing someone. An author.
- Andrew: And what happened?
- Maggie Chester: He committed suicide.
- Andrew: Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't...
- Maggie Chester: It's alright. Honestly. Really. I didn't really like him very much. I liked him even less after he committed suicide.”
Emma Thompson - Maggie Chester
Sir Kenneth Branagh - Andrew

“Listen to me ok, please? I love you David, and I love Sarah, but individually. David, together, I think you're a mess.”
Saul Rubinek - Larry