“- Cop: Who do you like better, Picard or Kirk?
- Nick: There's no question about it. Kirk.
- Cop: You bet! You gotta respect a guy who can fuck a green bitch and destroy a whole civilization, all in 60 minutes.”

Paulina Porizkova - Cop
Aaron Eckhart - Nick

“That script of yours has all the right elements. I mean it's got good characters and a terrific story. I don't know if you agree with me but I think story is the most important element of a script.”
Martin Landau - Jack Roth

“Dad was a card. I never met him. He died before the movie began.”
Jeff Daniels - Tom Baxter

“- Isaac: It's an interesting group of people, your friends are.
- Mary: I know.
- Isaac: Like the cast of a Fellini movie.”
Woody Allen - Isaac
Diane Keaton - Mary

- Berdine: No one understands Bettina. Her screen persona is a brilliant comment on the socio-political structure of stardom.
- Florence "Chicklet" Forrest: You get all that from "The Pizza Waitress with Three Heads"? I guess we are the only ones watching the movie.
Danni Wheeler - Berdine
Lauren Ambrose - Florence 'Chicklet' Forrest