“If your manner of speech is in any way a reflection of what goes on inside your head, you are lucky you can tie your shoes.”
Meg Ryan - Bonnie

“- Mac MacGuff: I thought you were the kind of girl who knew when to say when.
- Juno MacGuff: I don't know what kind of girl I am.”
J. K. Simmons - Mac MacGuff
Ellen Page - Juno MacGuff

“- Virus: You laughin' at me, huh? Huh? You laughin' at me? What am I, a clown? Do I amuse you? I'm what, I'm funny now? Huh? You must be laughin' at me; I don't see anybody else around here!
- Patty: You're mixing your movies, dipshit.”

Mitch Rouse - Virus
Janeane Garofalo - Patty

“- Cop: Who do you like better, Picard or Kirk?
- Nick: There's no question about it. Kirk.
- Cop: You bet! You gotta respect a guy who can fuck a green bitch and destroy a whole civilization, all in 60 minutes.”

Paulina Porizkova - Cop
Aaron Eckhart - Nick

“That script of yours has all the right elements. I mean it's got good characters and a terrific story. I don't know if you agree with me but I think story is the most important element of a script.”
Martin Landau - Jack Roth