- Alan Swann: Comedy is such a mystery to me. I feel the way Edmund Kean did.
- Benjy Stone: The great English actor?
- Alan Swann: On his death bed, Kean was asked how he felt. He answered, "Dying is easy. Comedy is hard".
Peter O'Toole - Alan Swann
Mark Linn-Baker - Benjy Stone

“The last thing to determine conclusively is whether you're in a comedy or a tragedy. Tragedy, you die. Comedy, you get hitched.”
Dustin Hoffman - Professor Jules Hilbert

“Once you realize what a joke everything is, being the Comedian is the only thing that makes sense.”
Jeffrey Dean Morgan - Edward Blake

“Kids are great for a comedian, because kids are funny without even trying to be funny.”
Jeff Foxworthy - Jeff Foxworthy

“The equivalent for a normal person would be to go into work each day in your underwear and try and do your job that you normally do. All of a sudden you can't do anything. That's how a comedian feels when he's doing a new bit.”
Jerry Seinfeld - Himself