“- Meredith: You are unbelievably out of line, young lady. Now you listen and listen good. I'm marrying your father in two weeks whether you like it or not. So I suggest you do not tangle with me anymore. You're in way over your head. is that clear?
- Annie: Crystal.”
Elaine Hendrix - Meredith Blake
Lindsay Lohan - Annie James

“- Nick Parker: I told Hallie.
- Meredith Blake: You did? And?
- Nick Parker: She went ballistic. She started yelling in French. I didn't even know she spoke French.”
Dennis Quaid - Nick Parker
Elaine Hendrix - Meredith Blake

“There used to be a time when you could be sure of catching old boots, cans, hat racks, boxes. Now it's prawns all the bloody time.”
Peter Vaughan - Winston the Ogre

“- Christina: You know when I was 22, my breasts were up here, nice and perky, but gravity has taken them. It's like 22, 28, 22, 28, 22...
- Courtney: Buy some new ones!”

Cameron Diaz - Christina Walters
Christina Applegate - Courtney Rockcliffe

“- Danny O'Shea: [Kevin and Danny are racing to claim the new player] This whole town may love you, but I'm the only one who knows how truly sick you are!
- Kevin O'Shea: I treated you like a prince!
- Danny O'Shea: You ignored me!
- Kevin O'Shea: I took you to see the Cleveland Indians!
- Danny O'Shea: You left me at the stadium!”
Rick Moranis - Danny O'Shea
Ed O'Neill - Kevin O'Shea