“All of us are freaks in one way or another.”
Sir John Hurt - The Countess

“- Icelan: He checks his sanity with a wrist watch!
- Jack Braddock: What do you check yours with, a dipstick?”

Paul Roebling - Icelan
Warren Oates - Capt. Jack Braddock

“I'm Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs! Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs!”

Paul Dano - Young Brian

“- Wang Chi-Yang: Where have you been till this hour?
- Wang Ta: Spending the night...
- Wang Chi-Yang: Stop! Not in front of your aunt.
- Wang Ta: I beg your forgiveness, Father. You were right. I should have listened. I was a fool.
- Wang Chi-Yang: Knowing you are a fool is the beginning of wisdom. Now I have my son back.”
Benson Fong - Wang Chi-Yang
James Shigeta - Wang Ta

“- Ryan: So you're not into her?
- Matt: I'm totally into her.
- Ryan: So how can you not want to fuck her?”
Paulo Costanzo - Ryan
Josh Hartnett - Matt