Is this meant to amuse me, Mr Burroughs? Why don't you stop by my office about 8 in the morning? To give you time to think about what you've done and to give me time to think about what I'm going to do. Oh, and... please, invite your "dead" roommate.
James D. O'Reilly - Mr. Bernhardt

“- Mr. Welling: If you were my kids, I'd punish you.
- Stymie: If we were your kids, we'd punish ourselves!”
Mel Brooks - Mr. Welling
Kevin Jamal Woods - Stymie

“- Dewey Finn: You know what? You don't have to worry about me 'cos i'm tough. If a kid gets outta line, I got no problem, smackin' 'em in the head.
- Rosalie Mullins: No. No, we don't use corporal punishment here.
- Dewey Finn: Okay, so just... verbal abuse?”

Jack Black - Dewey Finn
Joan Cusack - Rosalie Mullins

“She was only technically a girl, she acted like a woman. It's just so easy to blame a kid. Just because a girl knows how to imitate a woman does not mean she's ready to do what a woman does.”
Ellen Page - Hayley Stark

“- Abby: It's... Charlie.
- Santa Claus: Sheen? I thought he straightened out?
- Abby: Not that Charlie.
- Santa Claus: My Charlie. My son Charlie? He's on the naughty list? There's gotta be a mistake.”

Danielle Woodman - Abby
Tim Allen - Santa Claus