“- Pedro: Hey how am I driving, man?
- Man Stoner: I think we're parked.”

Cheech Marin - Pedro De Pacas
Tommy Chong - Anthony 'Man' Stoner

“I wouldn't dare go to sleep with you wandering around with a head full of acid, wanting to slice me up with that goddamn knife.”
Johnny Depp - Raoul Duke

“These drug cartels represent a clear and present danger to the national security of the United States.”
Donald Moffat - The President

“- Rusty Griswold: Ya' got Asteroids?
- Cousin Dale: Naw, but my dad does. Can't even sit on the toilet some days.”
Anthony Michael Hall - Rusty Griswold
John P. Navin Jr. - Cousin Dale

“Uh-oh. Get out the Alka-Seltzer.”
Barry Corbin - Uncle Bob