- Loan Officer: Because we're the "women's bank", we should go against standard banking practices and give you this very large, unsecured loan because you're the right gender.
- Laurel Ayres: Well... you know, it might send a message.
- Loan Officer: Right: that women don't know how to run a bank.
Jean De Baer - Loan Officer
Whoopi Goldberg - Laurel Ayres

- Martin: "Celia was in my employment for three and a half years. She proved herself to be an efficient housekeeper and a lively and provocative conversationalist. I heartily recommend her services".
- Celia: You didn't mention my breasts.
- Martin: Celia has exceptional breasts. Would you like me to add that?

Hugo Weaving - Martin
Geneviève Picot - Celia

“You know what the worst thing is about Billie? She's always right. She has the best instincts of anybody I ever met. God only knows where she got them.”
Sheila McCarthy - Sally Pike

“Did you read her latest novel? It's not even literature - it's drainage. The only good books she ever wrote were when she was with me: every morning, while she was sleeping, I'd cross out half her adjectives.”

Mandy Patinkin - Alfred De Musset

“- King Henry VIII: With no man to hold onto how do you plan to stay on your horse?
- Anne Boleyn: As you do Your Grace, with my thighs.”
Eric Bana - Henry Tudor
Natalie Portman - Anne Boleyn