“- Lars Smuntz: I don't believe it. He snapped the trap, ate the olive and left the pit just to mock us!
- Ernie Smuntz: I think you're giving him a little too much credit. Mice don't mock. They don't have a sense of humor or irony.”
Lee Evans - Lars Smuntz
Nathan Lane - Ernie Smuntz

“- Cole: You ever heard the story of the mouse, the lion, and the thorn?
- Mills: Yeah?
- Cole: There you go, then. In case we ever see that primate again.
- Mills: You do know that story is about a mouse becoming friends with the lion after taking the thorn out of his paw though, right?
- Cole: No it's not. The mouse kills the lion with the thorn.”
Shea Whigham - Cole
Jason Mitchell - Mills

“- Marquis Robert de la Cheyniest: Corneille! Put an end to this farce!
- Corneille, le majordome: Which one, Your Lordship?”
Marcel Dalio - Marquis Robert de la Cheyniest
Eddy Debray - Corneille, le majordome

“- Clifford Muckle - Boy in Bank: Mommy, doesn't that man have a funny nose?
- Mrs. Muckle - Mother in Bank: You mustn't make fun of the gentleman, Clifford. You'd like to have a nose like that full of nickels, wouldn't you?”

Bobby Larson - Clifford Muckle - Boy in Bank
Jan Duggan - Mrs. Muckle - Mother in Bank

- Michael "Mike" Ward: What's the use of talking to you? You think everything's a joke.
- Martin: It is. If it weren't, life wouldn't be worth living.
John McGuire - Michael "Mike" Ward
Cliff Clark - Martin