“- Chris: I volunteered. I dropped out of college, and told them I wanted the infantry, combat, and Vietnam.
- Crawford: You volunteered for this shit, man?
- Chris: You believe that?
- King: You's a crazy fucker, giving up college.
- Chris: It didn't make much sense. I wasn't learning anything.”
Charlie Sheen - Chris
Chris Pedersen - Crawford
Keith David - King

“- Randall - 'R': I want you to go to college. It's really important, okay?
- Randy Harris, Jr.: Did you?
- Randall - 'R': Yes.
- Randy Harris, Jr.: What did you learn?
- Randall - 'R': Give me a second, I'll think of it.”

Albert Brooks - Randall - 'R'
Desmond Harrington - Randy

“One's primary purpose at university level is to learn how to think.”
Laurence Fishburne - Professor Maurice Phipps

“- Dawn Weiner: I don't want to go to Disney World.
- Mark Weiner: Don't be stupid. If nothing else, it'll look good on your college résumé.”
Heather Matarazzo - Dawn Wiener
Matthew Faber - Mark Wiener

“- Shaun: I have to go to college.
- Cindy: Why?
- Shaun: Because it's what you do after high school.”
Colin Hanks - Shaun Brumder
Catherine O'Hara - Cindy Beugler