“- PC Danny Butterman: What's it like being stabbed?
- Nicholas Angel: It was the single most painful experience of my life.
- PC Danny Butterman: What's the second most painful?”
Nick Frost - PC Danny Butterman
Simon Pegg - Nicholas Angel

“Some wounds do not close; I have many such. One just walks around with them and sometimes one can feel them filling with blood.”
Olivia Colman - Queen Anne

“- Soldier: That cut looks painful.
- Tank Girl: I like pain.”
Lori Petty - Tank Girl

“- Kellie Frost: They say it's not when you get hurt bull ridin', it's how bad.
- Lane Frost: Naa, the bulls don't want nothin' to do with ya. They just wanna buck you off and get on with there business. A'sides... people'll heard you a lot sooner.”
Cynthia Geary - Kellie Frost
Luke Perry - Lane Frost

“When I had my ulcers, I was farting razor blades.”
Walter Matthau - Max Goldman