“- Prostitute: I'll give you a discount.
- Roy O'Bannon: That's the most romantic thing a woman has ever said to me.”
Alison King - Prostitute
Owen Wilson - Roy O'Bannon

“You want to know what I do for a living? Ask me. My time is very expensive, Mr. MacMillan. Probably more than yours. I get 500 dollars an hour. How much do you get? I get four-hundred dollars for a straight lay, three-hundred for a hand job, and five-hundred for head. If you want to wear my panties, that's another hundred.”

Barbra Streisand - Claudia Draper

“- Clive: [mockingly] I'll make you a deal. You just let me make another 500 bucks tonight, Ok. Then, I'll give you your body back because it soooo important to you.
- Clive: Waa waa I'm crying about my body... And then, you can just loan it to me every other weekend so I can pay off some gambling debts.”
Rachel McAdams - Clive\Jessica

“- Frank Rittenhauer: If this factory goes under, the whole town goes under.
- Boardroom Lady: That's when the whores come in.
- Paul Barish: Excuse me, what was that?
- Boardroom Lady: Men laying their trick-money down. Twenty dollars to pay the rent? Maybe not. Maybe instead I'll spend it on the whore.”
Sean McCann - Frank Rittenhauer
Helen Hughes - Boardroom Lady
Rob Lowe - Paul Barish

“- Harold Grisham: Vicki, you let go of this bag! Or I swear, I swear to God, I'll report you to the escort service!
- Donald P. Sinclair: Mr. Grisham, what's going on?
- Harold Grisham: The hooker! The hooker! The hooker is taking the money!
- Donald P. Sinclair: What hooker?
- Harold Grisham: Vicki! From the hotel!”
Dave Thomas - Harold Grisham
John Marwood Cleese - Donald P. Sinclair